


Panic

by JEAikman



Series: The Musketeers - prompts and one-shots [8]
Category: The Musketeers (2014)
Genre: Cuddles, Familial Love, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-20
Updated: 2014-02-20
Packaged: 2018-01-13 03:17:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1210627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JEAikman/pseuds/JEAikman
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Athos wonders how d'Artagnan seems so unaffected by his time tied to barrels of gunpowder, until he realises it's just an act and really, he's about as far from fine as you'd expect.</p>
<p>Bah my precious babies. I had prompts to fill but this just came to me, and i really wanted to write it, so the rest will have to wait.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Panic

_D'Artagnan nearly died today._ The thought was the one constant in Athos's mind as they were all debriefed and the Gascon had explained what had happened to him between when they searched the hideout and when they found each other again. Taking another swig of his wine, he tried to close his eyes against the images which assaulted his mind, but it only served to make them clearer.

_He was tied to the barrels of gunpowder._

_Vadim nearly blew him to pieces._

There was no way that the boy was alright after that ordeal - it wasn't possible. And yet, he'd brushed off the experience as if it were nothing - why? Why did he feel the need to pretend to be so strong? As he thought about it, Athos began to understand. _Of course_ he'd keep up a brave front when he was around the rest of them.

He'd wait till he was alone to break down and let the day catch up to him. He'd be alone, just like he had - _when he was sitting on a pile of barrels of gunpowder waiting to explode._

 

Making up his mind, Athos made his way to the Bonacieux's house, unsurprised to find that both Constance and her husband were out. No doubt they had business to do, daily lives to go about. They wouldn't have been told anything about the danger that the boy had been in, and Athos highly doubted that Monsieur Bonacieux would overly care, and the boy would not want to worry Constance, the fool.

The door had been left unlocked, and he cautiously made his way to d'Artagnan's room. When he did not immediately see the boy, he panicked, but then noticed him in the corner of the room, pressed against the wall with his hands wrapped around his knees, rocking back and forth and staring at nothing at all. Athos gulped. This was not good. He was not good at dealing with people when they were in this state.

So he knelt down and approached very cautiously, as one might an injured animal, or an untrusting child. There was no reaction when he reached towards him - he wasn't sure he wouldn't prefer the lad to lash out at him. He would know how to cope with that. When he actually touched the boy, however, the young Gascon flinched and jumped away from him, only succeeding in crashing the back of his head into the wall. He blinked rapidly, coming back to himself. When he saw that Athos was there, he thought he might just die of embarrassment and shame. He'd seen him so weak now - why would the older man ever let him join the Musketeers now?

"D'Artagnan, whatever you're thinking, stop it right now. Just _breathe_. In, out, nice and slow until you _calm down_ , alright?" d'Artagnan managed a shaky nod as he tried to do what Athos asked of him. Athos kept his hands firmly on the boys shoulders, and in return, d'Artagnan gripped his wrists, desperate for something to hold onto, something to ground him. Once his breaths evened out, he all but sagged forward towards Athos, who slung an arm around his waist and helped him to sit on the bed, before kneeling in front of him to look him in the eye.

"d'Artagnan, I want you to listen to me very closely, alright - do you think you're back to yourself enough to do that?" He asked, his voice soft, gently coaxing a nod out of the young man. "What you did - we had no right to ask that of you. You're untrained, inexperienced - you haven't been taught how to handle these situations. And I am _so sorry_ that you went through what you did because of it." D'Artagnan tried to look away, but Athos carefully tilted his face up again, his gloved thumb brushing soothingly against his cheek. "You were scared, d'Artagnan." Before the boy could protest, Athos placed a finger firmly over his lips to silence him. "That's alright. But _you_ have to accept that it's alright. You have to say something, to someone - if not us, then Constance, perhaps." He paused, sighing. "Don't just try to block yourself off from it, pretend you don't feel it. It doesn't work that way."

 

They were quiet for a while, neither of them moving, until d'Artagnan let out a long breath and relaxed against Athos, who pulled him into his arms, knowing that what the boy needed was physical reassurance that he wasn't alone.

"I thought I was going to die." The Gascon admitted. He was shaking again, gripping tight to fistfuls of Athos's shirt "I was all alone and I was going to die and I didn't want to die and I was so scared and then he almost got away and then he said he could have killed me and only didn't because it was a _game_ to him." He paused for breath, and Athos could tell from the way his voice cracked that he was close to tears. "I...what do I do now?" He asked, so frightened, but so hopeful - he was looking to Athos - _Athos_ \- for guidance.

"I'm afraid I may not be the best example to follow." He admitted quietly.

"So you... you mean I _shouldn't_ drown my worries a seemingly endless supply of the finest wine Paris has to offer?" Athos chuckled warmly, but grew serious after a minute.

"Don't ever become like me, d'Artagnan. I... am not good-"

"If you're about to say you're not a good man, then stop. If you weren't, would you be so kind to me when... when I'm so pathetic?"

" _d'Artagnan"_ He was becoming a little frustrated now. Why didn't the boy understand? "You were nearly _blown up_. That's not - you were bound and helpless. It's not as if you were given much of a chance to defend or save yourself - not like in a duel. And yet-" He paused, sitting d'Artagnan up and placing his hands firmly on the shoulders "here you stand. Alive, and mostly whole. You are not pathetic in the slightest. You are courageous. You have a heart as true as any Musketeer's, and don't you forget it."

"But-"

"Do not argue with me, d'Artagnan" Athos warned, but noticed the boy rapidly blinking to try and stay awake. "Sleep, lad. You've had quite the ordeal today. I'll be here when you wake."


End file.
